RAW 5/5/14 (Hulu edition)

1. 20-man Battle Royal to apparently strip Dean Ambrose of his United States Championship.

2. I was sort of hoping Rollins and Reigns would catch Ambrose in mid-air when someone would try to eliminate him. Oh well.

3. Sheamus is the new United States Champion! I wonder if this means he’s been relegated back in the mid-card.

4. Hunter, they need to change your title to CNO: Chief Narcissistic Officer. How long is the Authority angle going to last?

5. “No hard feelings, fella”? Is this the start of the next Sheamus heel run? I know that he just took advantage of the opportunity, but that reaction makes me wonder.

6. So is Kane attacking Daniel Bryan right away? Nope, just Stephanie. As if that isn’t bad enough.

7. Did Brock Lesnar do something, Paul? *wink*

8. Nice shiner, RVD. For all the times he’s been in extreme matches, he seems to come through them very well. He’s always had a great stretching regimen, and I imagine that has only increased as he’s gotten older.

9. Is Swagger going to interfere in the Cesaro v. RVD match?

10. Unexpected brutality from Cesaro. I guess they really want him to be a heel. RVD with the DQ win.

11. I like creeped-out John Cena. And I like Bray Wyatt for making it happen.

12. “Breach of contract?” Are Daniel Bryan and the Shield going to team up to put an end to this Authority angle already?

13. (I don’t blame the WWE for this, but I despise watching Hulu on the Roku box.)

14. Does Kane interfere now? Or does Kane attack later…at the car, perhaps?

15. Solid match between Bryan and AdR. AdR is fine as long as he doesn’t talk.

16. I thought Bryan was going to make AdR tap to an armbreaker.

17. There’s Kane. No, wait…

18. Back at the car…which won’t start. And there he is in the back seat. (The WWE is so predictable. And they’ve done this car shtick before.)

19. Okay, enough Brie screams already.

20. Someone impound the Exotic Express before it can reach Albany!!!

21. Rematch between Big E and IC Champion Bad News Barrett. Hope this is as good as the match at Extreme Rules.

22. Barrett is over with this Albany crowd. Feel bad for Big E. They had him off TV for so long that he lost momentum.

23. Good match. Not as good as Extreme Rules, but good. Barrett retains after a rake to the eyes and a bullhammer. Not a surprise.

24. WE…THE PEOPLE!!! Go for it, Zeb!

25. NO! PLEASE no Adam Rose! What’s being cut so this clown can appear? PLEASE GIVE US LEO KRUGER BACK!!!

26. Main Event: The Shield v. the Wyatts. Expecting an appearance from Evolution. No mystery there.

27. Bit of a brawl to start things off. That will probably mark much of the match.

28. Seth Rollins is the next generation of Jeff Hardy. Without the failed drug tests. Scary agility.

29. WE WANT TABLES!!! WE WANT TABLES!!!

30. Great back and forth! THIS IS AWESOME!!!

31. And there’s Evolution to ruin a great match. Bray pins Reigns after Hunter eats a Superman punch.

32. And there’s the jackals…

Not on hulu:

1. No Ryback v. Cody Rhodes. They’re building toward Cody v. Goldust. Be nice if we’d see it. Cut Afam Rose next time!

2. No Rusev v. Kingston. I can do without it since Kofi is likely getting squashed.

3. NO MR. T SEGMENT! I pity the fool who cut that from Hulu!